Waking Up From a Technological Coma
If you've read my previous blog posts, you know that I have long been concerned about the effect modern technology – especially smartphones – has had on me and on humanity in general. I have written about doing media fasts, cutting back my technology use, privacy and security, making sure you use your technology intentionally and that it doesn't use you, and other related topics. Well, I'm somewhat embarrassed to say that over the past 18 months, I have been “off the wagon” when it comes to technology addiction. But for a few weeks now I've been trying something that is helping me snap out of it (again). And I need to share my experience if only to show solidarity with others who are going through this same thing.
In September of 2023, I discovered a hobby and passion as a DJ streamer on Twitch, collecting music on physical media (compact disc, vinyl, cassette) and playing that music live for viewers. When I wasn't streaming on Twitch, I was watching other streamers. I also started using social media – particularly Instagram and Threads – to try to promote my stream, discover music, and plug into the DJ and streamer communities. I created my own Discord server for my Twitch stream and joined other servers. I started playing video games again both on PC and retro gaming on a PlayStation 2. When I wasn't doing any of those things I was on social media or doomscrolling the news or watching movies and TV shows – pretty much finding any excuse to be glued to a screen.
Most of my free time over the past 18 months has been consumed with these activities. And while I did find some degree of entertainment and genuine-but-fleeting joy in these things, I knew that my personal and spiritual life were suffering. I have felt disconnected from the real world, my family, my local community – I realize now I've probably been trying to escape from it. The real world can seem scary and overwhelming and it's healthy to find ways to cope and escape, but you can't let those things consume you, either.
Being a Twitch streamer, if you are trying to be consistent about it and grow your channel, can take over your life. Especially when you are starting out and trying to make a good try of it, when you are not actually streaming, you are thinking about and working on being a better streamer. Thinking about what kind of experiences you want to create, learning about all of the technology and systems involved, reading articles and watching videos about streaming, watching other streamers to learn from them. And for me, there's also been the element of collecting music on physical media, getting the equipment needed to maintain it and play it, and learning all about how to do all of that. And you are spending as many hours as possible actually streaming. When I started out, I think I was trying to stream 20 hours per week. I've since settled in to 8-12 hours per week on average, but as I said earlier, I've still been putting considerable “off air” time into streamer things.
While I have been excited and passionate about this streaming hobby and found some meaning and purpose in it, I have felt that something is off. But I knew that because I was in it so deeply, I couldn't really see or understand how and why I felt that way.
I needed a break. So I decided to observe Lent for the first time in my life. And the thing I chose to give up? Twitch.
I'm a Christian, but my church (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) doesn't officially observe Lent, although it does encourage us to develop our own Christ-centered Easter traditions in our families and make it as important and special a season as Christmas. I have Roman Catholic relatives, so I decided this year I would observe Lent with them for the first time in my life.
One of the Lenten traditions is to give up or abstain from a pleasure or a vice or something you very much enjoy, and to replace it with something that will help you grow personally and spiritually and draw you closer to Jesus Christ. For the nearly seven weeks of Lent this year, I chose to give up Twitch – both as a viewer and streamer – along with all non-religious or faith-promoting “video entertainments” (video games, movies, TV, YouTube, etc.). Instead of doing those things, I have been reading books (a lot of books), writing, spending time with family, going to the temple, and quite a bit of thinking and praying. Three weeks in, I feel as if I'm beginning to wake up from a technological coma.
Before Lent, I had already started to make some changes in other digital areas of my life. I had deleted (not deactivated, completely deleted) all of my Meta accounts – Facebook, Instagram, Threads, and WhatsApp. I hadn't been using Twitter for years but deleted that account, too, for good measure. I deleted other distracting apps from my phone like video streaming apps (I haven't had games on my phone for years – that's at least one thing I've been able to be consistent with). I have a feeling that I might eventually be giving up video games again and even Twitch before this latest purge is over.
If this digital detox process sounds familiar, it's because I have gone through this many times and written about it on this very blog, as I said at the beginning of this post. Can you relate? The pendulum always seems to eventually swing back and I eventually end up indulging in all the distractions and entertainments again. But I will keep trying. Because I know I need to change. Each time I relapse, things get worse.
If you are fighting the same struggle, know that you are not alone. The fight is worth it because we are not only fighting our own impulsive nature, we are fighting massive technology companies who have invested billions upon billions of dollars and thousands upon thousands of man hours in developing ways to make the technology we use extremely addictive and to influence our thoughts and behavior – all to monetize and profit from us. I won't elaborate on this any further here, but volumes have already been written about it and I encourage you to explore this topic on your own. Suffice it to say, we have to be vigilant and persistent.
I am currently reading the book Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport – this is a good place to start if you want to know more about how addictive modern technology can be and what you can do about it. Newport writes about the phenomenon of people trying to make these kinds of changes in their lives – cutting out social media, getting rid of smartphones, etc. – only to eventually give in and revert back to their distractions. So he makes the case that we must first embrace and ground ourselves in a philosophy – in this case Digital Minimalism – if we hope to make permanent changes. The change must come from inside not outside. I'm going to sincerely try to embrace and live Digital Minimalism, but I'm going beyond that in conjunction with Lent. I'm trying to also embrace and ground myself in my faith and appeal to a higher power – to God – for additional help.
I feel like I am still waking up from this latest technological coma, but in the remaining weeks of Lent, I hope to establish a good foundation for permanent personal change. Change that I will try my hardest – with God's help – to maintain well beyond Easter.
There are other related ideas and topics I've been thinking about during this time – I hope to be able to articulate them in future posts. And I will try to give you an update after Easter on how things went and my plans going forward.