That's a line from the movie (based on the book by the same name), The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. I only recently watched it for the first time. As I wrestled with the decision of whether or not to quit Twitch, this line resonated with me when I heard it.

I no longer refer to people who watch my Twitch channel as a “community.” I call them viewers or friends, but I don't think it's accurate or helpful to refer to them as a community.

It's interesting the things you come across online when you wake up in the middle of the night. For some reason at 2:30am today, my half-conscious-but-apparently-not-tired-enough-to-sleep brain decided to search Startpage for “boycott Twitch” and discovered there is an actual Amazon boycott starting today. I took that as a sign. I'm joining the boycott. I won't be streaming on Twitch this week.

I can't shake a feeling I've had since before Easter.

Sometimes I can almost forget it. But like my tinnitus, it's always there when I stop and think about it.

It feels like a chapter of my life may be ending. And I feel...mournful. Sad.

I started watching Twitch again after taking a break for 7 weeks. It's only been a few days, but I think it's causing me to slip back into old thought patterns and habits. I need to cut way back and limit myself to specific streams and times. Or stop watching altogether.